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SPN Fanfic: Born Into a Bad Litter - CaffieneKittySpace
('i' before 'e' if you're looking for me)
SPN Fanfic: Born Into a Bad Litter
Title: Born Into a Bad Litter
Characters: Dean, Sam, Jo
Classification: GEN, AU, alternate scene, crack
Rating: GEN, PG.
Warnings: Spoilers for Born Under a Bad Sign.
Word Count: 650 words
Disclaimer: The boys and their world aren't mine.
Summary: AU re-telling of a scene from Born Under a Bad Sign. Crack.
A/N: Another angsty scene, crackified for the spn_crackfic Reversal Challenge, and a... not exactly a continuation of "Effanineffable Secret" but in the same AU. Probably best if you go read that first (it's okay, it's short), but all you really need to know is that Sam is a were-kitten.

Born Into a Bad Litter
by CaffieneKitty

"My head feels like it's on fire, Dean!"

Dean kept pointing the gun at Sam, but took a sidelong glance at his watch and hoped he was right about moonrise. "Just hang on a minute, Sam."

"SHOOT MEeeeeow!?"

The knife dropped point first, embedding into the floor next to Jo's foot. Sam disappeared like Obi-wan Kenobi stabbed with a lightsabre, clothes falling empty to the ground. Mostly empty.

Jo stared down at the slightly twitching pile of clothing and looked over at Dean. "What the hell did you do, Dean?"

"Me? Nothin'" Dean put his gun away and started rummaging through Sam's clothes.

"What? Where did, Sam was... Untie me dammit!" Jo thrashed against the pole in frustration.

"Just a sec. OW! You little..." Dean pulled up a yellow ball of hissing, snarling fluff with jet-black eyes. "Yeah, I thought so. Get out of my brother!"

"MROWR!" yowled the kitten, rotating around with feline flexibility to sink tiny, sharp teeth and claws into Dean's thumb.

"OW!" Dean said again. He reached into an inside pocket of his jacket and pulled out a spray bottle. "Naughty kitten! Behave!" He sloshed the bottle, finger on the trigger.

The kitten, still gnawing on Dean's thumb in a valiant attempt to break the skin, growled and glared at Dean with black-eyed kittenish fury.

Dean smirked. "Seriously, you have no idea how long this might last, there's nothing you can do like this, oh, and by the way?" Dean shook the bottle again. "Holy water."


"Really. Wanna try me?" Dean's eyes glinted as he menacingly aimed the spray bottle at the kitten.

The demon-possessed kitten snorted in palpable disgust. A cloud of black smoke whooshed out of the tiny body and shot out through a window. In Dean's hand, the kitten blinked clear green eyes and sneezed.

"You okay there, Sammy?" Dean said, putting away the spray bottle of holy water to check Sam for injuries and scritch his transformed brother behind the ears.

"Could you at least pass me the knife?" said Jo, who, Dean reflected as he tousled his brother's fur, sounded a little annoyed. Tied to a post. Right. He transferred Sam to his left hand, picked up the huge knife and sawed Jo loose.

She stepped away from the post and rubbed her wrists, warily staring at the Winchesters, feline and non. "You turned your brother into a kitten?"

Dean pondered. Were-kittens probably didn't top many hunter's lists of things worth hunting down, but Sam's little furry problem didn't need to be advertised. "Naw, it's gotta be some kind of demon trick. He'll get over it."

Jo peered down at the ginger tabby kitten, leaning in close. "But... why would a demon want to..." Sam batted at the trailing ends of her long hair. "Aw, he's so cute!" She rubbed under Sam's fuzzy chin with a finger.

"Yeah, see? That's probably their plan. Disarm you with the cuteness then-" he made a striking snake motion with his fingers "-gotcha!"

Jo snatched her hand away and took a half-step back. Kitten Sam waved his paws after her retreating hair and then proceeded to try to crawl up the sleeve of Dean's jacket.

"So, yeah, anyways, Jo," said Dean, extracting Sam from his sleeve and settling him between his neck and the turned up collar of his jacket, "Nice to see you again and all that, but-" he bent and scooped up Sam's clothes and shoes, "-we gotta go now. Good luck with the new life."

"But I, we, he... what?" said Jo as Dean pushed out the door and into the night.

Dean fished through Sam's pockets looking for keys as he walked across the parking lot to the Impala. "You do that disappearing thing again, Sam, I swear, we're going to the nearest vet and you are getting a microchip tracker implanted."

Curled up around Dean's collar, Sam just purred and shed fine yellow hairs down the back of his brother's neck.

- - -
(that's it)

Tags: , , , , , ,
Current Mood: amused amused
Current Music: "Cat Scratch Fever" ~ Ted Nugent

35 comments or Leave a comment
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thelonejuliet From: thelonejuliet Date: July 4th, 2007 04:24 pm (UTC) (Link)
Hehe. I'm just picturing Sam as my sister's cat, Tigger (who's a yellow tabby - and currently bathing himself, ew) - and it's hilarious! :)

So glad there was a follow up of sorts. *giggle*
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: July 5th, 2007 07:17 am (UTC) (Link)
It kind of ambushed me in the middle of a busy work day, so I'm glad it turned out okay. :-)
girlfan1979 From: girlfan1979 Date: July 4th, 2007 04:33 pm (UTC) (Link)
Sadly, the microchips don't do tracking yet, or I would be a very happy kitty mommy... I *completely* understand where Dean is coming from.
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: July 5th, 2007 07:24 am (UTC) (Link)
Aw. *hugs*

Yeah, I know they don't do tracking, but I figured Dean might not have looked that far into it. There are GPS collars now, though, so I'm thinking it's only a matter of time before there's GPS implants. However, they don't have them now. Which sucks. :-/
eesia From: eesia Date: July 4th, 2007 04:33 pm (UTC) (Link)
*giggles like crazy*
Oh dear, so bad Kripke didn't see this when they filmed BUBS :)
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: July 5th, 2007 07:29 am (UTC) (Link)
Thanks! Yep, it would have been a very different episode if Kripke decided to turn Sam into a kitten. That would have been an interesting way to let Jared take a few episodes off for that surgery he had to have last year.
curtainpull From: curtainpull Date: July 4th, 2007 10:35 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh God, the combination of funniness and cuteness in this is just killing me. Dean with a kitten? It's all I can do not just to comment with a massive awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
I will say, however, that this description rules all black-eyed kittenish fury. I wanna see that!
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: July 5th, 2007 07:31 am (UTC) (Link)
I will say, however, that this description rules all black-eyed kittenish fury. I wanna see that!

I actually tried to do a picture for it and managed to creep myself out big time. *shiver* So no graphics of that.
julorean From: julorean Date: July 5th, 2007 02:52 am (UTC) (Link)
Hee! Oh, this is great! The holy water spray bottle! Posessed!Kitten!Sam gnwaing on his fingers! I love this cute crack. :D Hee!
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: July 5th, 2007 07:33 am (UTC) (Link)
labseraph From: labseraph Date: July 5th, 2007 02:55 am (UTC) (Link)

Love your were-kitty!Sam 'verse. Made of awesome.

More, please?
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: July 5th, 2007 07:40 am (UTC) (Link)
Wow, it's a 'verse? O.o

Well, if more bunnies jump me for it as insistently as this one did, I'll post them. No guarantees though, they'll be fighting their way through about thirty other things in various stages of progress. :-)
(Deleted comment)
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: July 5th, 2007 03:24 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks! :-)
shadow_of_doubt From: shadow_of_doubt Date: September 1st, 2007 05:21 pm (UTC) (Link)
Aw! So cute! Sammy is a were-kitty! How original!
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: September 2nd, 2007 01:04 pm (UTC) (Link)
Heh, I've seen a few fics where Sam or Dean turn into cats, but I guess the "were-kitten" aspect is a bit different :-)
nativestar From: nativestar Date: September 7th, 2007 11:26 am (UTC) (Link)
Cute and funny! Thanks for sharing. Again this was recced at spn_epific so I'll be putting into the master fic list unless you have any objections.
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: September 7th, 2007 04:05 pm (UTC) (Link)
Hahaha, oh cool! *grin* No objections :-)
deej1957 From: deej1957 Date: September 8th, 2007 04:41 pm (UTC) (Link)
This was just recced, um, somewhere... :-) I love stories where Sam is turned into a kitten or puppy, and this was just great! The spray bottle and the demon leaving, Samkitten cuddling into Dean's neck and leaving cat hairs... Just a darling story *G*
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: September 8th, 2007 09:12 pm (UTC) (Link)
Hee! Thanks! :-)
wearethestars From: wearethestars Date: October 8th, 2007 05:03 am (UTC) (Link)
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: October 8th, 2007 05:44 am (UTC) (Link)
Thank you!
gottalovev From: gottalovev Date: October 8th, 2007 07:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
LOL! what a great alternate scene! so cute!
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: October 9th, 2007 02:28 am (UTC) (Link)
Thanks! *pets your icon*
starrylizard From: starrylizard Date: November 24th, 2008 10:01 am (UTC) (Link)
Bwah! *loves* &hearts ADORABLE!! :D
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: November 25th, 2008 06:26 am (UTC) (Link)
*grin* Thanks! Glad you liked it!
calamityjim From: calamityjim Date: November 28th, 2010 06:52 am (UTC) (Link)
OMG! THERE WAS MOAR! SQUEE! I love this! Just love!
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: November 30th, 2010 04:27 am (UTC) (Link)
Yay. :-)
lolaann1 From: lolaann1 Date: February 18th, 2013 12:25 am (UTC) (Link)
LOLZ! That is just too funny and cute. Love it!
caffienekitty From: caffienekitty Date: February 21st, 2013 06:20 am (UTC) (Link)
Glad you liked it!
35 comments or Leave a comment
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